All I Wanted

All I wanted was for you
To love me
To see me
For all my potential
To appropriately assess
The situation
And see that I could make it
Trying to perfect me
Will take time
I expected patience from you
Because that is what you preached
But ye of little faith
Doubt me now
Bothering me with petty things
You see my frustration
But hardly provide alleviation
I hope that the current outlook
Does not deter you from helping me
To my goals
That is why you are here
For me
To push me to greatness
But you refuse now to be here
Vacating the role that is
Necessary for immediate relief
Why would you turn from me
Leaving me to possible desperate measures
Is this to prove something to me
Or something to yourself
I am unsure
Yet I will continue
Along this path alone

Is This About Me or You?

You never made it easy for me
The sacrifices you took
Have been thrown in my face
So now you call me selfish
Am I now undeserving of love
Our disconnect will affect
Everything in my future
But all you see is that
I am not there for you
Do you see
How when I am there
You are not there for me
Should I continue to sacrifice
To appease you and others
Should I admittedly be unhappy
To make you happy
Why can't I take this time now
To figure out how to deal
Now matter what I say you don't understand
You want me to make the same sacrifices
That you made
But where did that lead you
Here or there does not change love
And you should know that
Let me decide
Because circular conversations
End up in headaches or heartbreaks

Reap

Easy is not how I would explain my life
And your absence play a huge role
Hate and anger still rest in my heart and soul
How more selfish could you be
Your excuses never meant a thing to me
How hard did you really try
If you did
It is not evident
Not in my life at least
Where was learning to know about your child on your priority list
I laugh at all the people that called you
A good person
That I should want to know you
Yet I remained without you
My formative years passed
Never to be repeated
Lessons learned, fears faced, memories made
How could you not care
Mistake or not, I am here
Another fatherless black male
Just like you
Like thousands more
Who will stand and break the trend
Who will make amends
The injustice served to me and those alike
One day I will let go
Because you will reap