I Am Not There

They told me
That you came
To my front door
Knocking
I guess you were expecting
Me to be at home
My neighbors
Nice but nosy
Said you were there
For a while after
The knocking
Lounging on my stoop
Awaiting my return
Many times before
I posed the question
To you about what you
Would do when
I am not there
Don't keep waiting for me
I had to go
Had to leave

Fade

Now that I am down
I can write this
Given my current
Outlook I feel this
Feeling that goes
Beyond black and white
The grey area
That many say does not exist
I live in it
Something nonexistent
I am that
Reality that fades to unreal
Because you refuse to believe
You are what you see
In the mirror
Drugs, alcohol and the lime light
Give you blinders to reality
Fading out all that should
Put you on the right path
So you fade out my words
Erase my voice
Eradicate my existence